I'm too sad to tell you

Bas Jan Ader (1971)

For the theme resistance, I was deeply inspired by Bas Jan Ader. I made a soundscape to go with his work, "I'm Too Sad To Tell You" (1971).\

I first made a combination of chords then I sang along in the same keys. I then put my voice recording into Ableton and adjusted it. The low vibrating sound is my singing. I started Ableton last month. This week, I am trying to figure out how to EQ sound, finding the noises and cancelling them. Still, there are a lot of noises here — it sounds just like grief.


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Experiencing grief can be viewed as a resistance from moving forward. In the silent reel, Bas Jan Ader's facial expression attracted me.  I tried to do the same film and realized how difficult it was to accomplish. One have to be so unconscious of oneself to stare at a camera with true emotions. Are emotions real when it is being consciously captured for a purpose?

In our daily life we are constantly pulling up or dropping down our skin from the original state. When our facial expression changes are we creating resistance to our skin? I once read that, "Grief is just love with no place to go." I am interested in exploring the resistance of grief and love through bodily expressions. For example, arching our bodies when we are sad and the amount of energy that is needed for our face to change when we cry. Is it possible that when we are in love, we actually feel lighter?